Alter Ego
by Orange Socks and Polka Dots
Summary: Lucy Walker was living two lives to make up for the one she'd lost. A person can only live like that for so long before someone intervenes. SpotOC
1. Chapter 1

**I'm back! So, before I start out on this new story I just really want to say thanks to everyone why was so nice about me quitting the last story. It meant a lot to me to have you guys be so understanding.**

**I hope** **you'll like this story.**

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She hated her job.

She loved her job.

She would never raise her voice.

She was as loud as ten other girls combined.

She only said what needed to be heard.

She could and would talk for hours about absolutely nothing.

She was proper and conservative.

She was called cutting-edge and wild.

She was plain and accepted that.

She was gorgeous and she knew it.

She was too serious for her own good.

She laughed constantly.

She was obedient and respectful.

She fought for what she believed in, no matter what who she had to argue with.

She was numb while she worked.

She was completely focused while she worked.

She cooked and cleaned.

She sang, danced and flipped off of horses.

She was an average housemaid.

She was an extraordinary rodeo-show girl.

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Lucy Walker were one girl living two opposite lives to make up for the one she had left behind. 

Lucy sat on a beam in the barn playing with her show horse's mane. Her boss had told her to meet him there to discuss her horse, Cheeko, after the show that evening. She petted his head, which he had rested on her shoulder. She looked at him trying to be innocent and couldn't help but laugh. It was almost like he knew he was in trouble. "Why can't you act normal?" She asked and leaned into his neck. He immediately became irritated and pulled away from her, causing her to fall off the stall divider she was perched on. She glared at him from the aisle between the lines of stalls. "Jerk."

"I'm telling you, somethin' ain't right with that gelding." Teased Tom who had entered the stables just in time to witness the fall. Tom owned and ran the Wild West Rodeo Show and looked the part. He had a handlebar mustache, cowboy hat and a Texas businessman accent. Over the past six months Lucy came to think of him more as an uncle than as her boss.

"I like 'em!" Lucy said enthusiastically as she jumped to her feet from the hay-strewn floor.

"Yeah, I know you do." He said with a hint of annoyance directed towards the medium sized painted horse. "Listen, he's been acting up during the show. He's snapping at the other horses and rearing up. If we can get him to stay in formation, it'll hopefully straighten him out." Lucy frowned. "No, it ain't your fault. It's his." The sixteen-year-old brunette continued to scowl even deeper.

Assuming she knew that he was going to ask her for more rehearsal hours, Lucy whined, "I can't give you any more hours than I already am. I can't come during the day."

"Why don't you quit that job?" Tom asked.

"Because I need the extra money."

"Why? You know we'd give you food and a place to stay if you needed it."

"I need to save the money. Tom, we both know I can only do this for a few more years."

"So? You can marry Frank in a couple a' years and he'll take care 'a you." Frank was Tom's son.

Lucy felt awkward at this suggestion. Frank was somewhat repulsive, but she couldn't say that to his father. "I couldn't."

"Lucy, you're already a part of our family. Why not make it official?"

"I'm sixteen Tom! I'm not thinking about these sort of things." She lied. She thought about it often but Frank usually wasn't involved with the idea of marriage.

Looking peeved at the subtle rejection of his son, Tom changed the subject. "Anyways, if you can't practice more, I'm going to need to get you a new horse."

"Who? You don't have any other painted horses with smooth enough gaits."

"What about Frisco?"

"I'll fall if I stand up on him." She said shortly, still upset by Tom's suggestion regarding Frank.

"We'll figure something out." Tom answered.

"I have to go." Lucy said, grabbing the bag that held her brightly colored costumes and left the barn.

"Get a good night sleep. You haven't been lookin' so good."

"Yeah, sure." She said sarcastically and started walking away.

"Oh yeah, and don't write Frank out of the picture. You might not love 'em, but he's a good kid and he'd be a good husband. You can stay with the rodeo and everything."

Lucy didn't turn around and kept walking. She felt frustrated and offended all of a sudden. Inside of her head, it was a crazy jumble of confusion, exhaustion, stress and the marriage conversation coming up again with someone other than her parents coming up made it all seem like too much to handle.

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**Reviews are, as always, greatly appreciated.**

**In case you were wondering, Cheeko is a real horse and he's amazingly stupid.**

**Oh yeah, that disclaimer crap needs done... Bitches, please I own you all (or at least all the characters so far.)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 like woah. :o) Ch-ch-check it out yo. (Guess who had to listen to the Beastie Boys in the car with some silly boys in the car today. :oP ) Anyways, enjoy.**

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Leaving the arena Lucy tried to calm herself down. Waiting around the corner was a boy an exiting audience member may have mistaken for an actor in the show due to his cowboy hat and red bandanna waited for her.

"Lucy." He said as a greeting. She didn't stop walking but he fell into step with her quickly.

"Jack." She said, frustrated. She played with the collar of her white shirt and took a minute to appreciate how comfortable it was compared to her maid's uniform and her costume for the rodeo.

"You alright?" He asked, concerned by his friend's short tone.

"No."

"What's wrong?" Lucy looked up at him, but said nothing. "Lucy, don't think I can read yer mind."

"No," She said nodding with her eyes directed at the bricks beneath my feet. "I don't suppose you can."

"Well then?"

"It's stupid Frank!" She blurted out. "He's so ... stupid."

"What'd he do?"

"I don't even know! I think he proposed to me."

"What?" A shocked Jack replied. "You _think _he proposed?"

"I don't know. It was his father."

"What a ..." She lifted an eyebrow that clearly reminded him to watch his language. "Well, he is."

"I know. Just don't say it around me."

"I can't believe some kid's dad asked you to marry him. That's weird as hell."

She rolled her blue eyes and nodded in agreement. "Tomorrow night's going to be awkward." Lucy knew his father would report our conversation back to him.

"Yeah." He answered thoughtfully. After a pause, he asked, "You wanna meet some 'a the guys?"

"No." I told him, shortly but with the right amount of . "I need sleep."

"Naw, sleep ain't important."

"Yeah, it kinda is." She said sarcastically.

"Just come for a little while."

"No."

"Lucy..."

"Jack, I don't have time to do anything but work, eat and, if I'm lucky, sleep."

"That's your problem." He said like he was making an obvious statement.

"I don't have a problem."

"Yes you do. Ya never have any fun."

"I have fun at doing the horse show."

"You used to. Now it's just work. Please, you owe it to yourself."

"What about work tomorrow?" She demanded. "I can't just stay in bed all day."

"Sure you can. Just say you're sick."

"I don't lie."

"Well ... get drunk and then you really will be sick."

"Jack!" She said taking offense but still seeing the humor in his statement.

"I'm just kidding. It's not like newsies can afford to get drunk as it is. Alcohol is too expensive and we can't lose a single day of sellin'." He teased.

"Well, I can't miss work either."

"Yes you can."

She smirked, thinking about the Swansons' reaction would be to her not being able to work on account of being sick. She knew they wouldn't mind. In fact, they'd take good care to cure her of her false illness. "Fine."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I guess. I have to be home by two though."

"Will do."

They walked a little longer in silence until we reached the converted home now known as the Newsboy's Lodging House. Lucy had never been inside of it, just met Jack outside of it from time to time.

Jack entered the main room and some of the boys looked at him and said they're greeting. Lucy followed a few steps behind him and felt immediately uncomfortable. The honest truth was that she knew she was an attractive girl. Her medium brown hair curled perfectly and her blue eyes popped out against her pale skin and black eyelashes. She had delicate cheekbones and heart shaped lips. Even though she knew she'd been blessed with natural beauty she was incredibly humble and shy. She had always thought she was plain until she had left her family and came to the city. People knew that girls who starred in Tom Jenning's shows weren't unattractive and they had told her that when she was given the part.

She was confident in front of people in bright colored clothes jumping around horses and singing and dancing, but there and then standing in front of them unable to hide her regular self scared her. She stared at the ground until she felt a protective hand on her shoulder and turned to see Jack behind her.

"All right boys, dis is Lucy."

"So?" Asked a kid in the back corner.

"Dat's Spot Conlon." Jack told me.

"So?" I mocked him, but smiled at him while the boys laughed.

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**Honestly, I'm not all that crazy about this chapter. I don't know why, but I don't like it. Tell me what you think.**

**I think updates should being coming faster from now on, but I've thought wrong before.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay, sorry about the last chapter and the first and third person issues I was having. I wrote the whole chapter in first person and then I realized it was supposed to be third person and I was like "Crap." So I went back and changed it but I guess I missed some stuff. I'm so sorry guys. You have no idea how stupid I feel.**

**Anyways...**

**Viola! A new chapter!**

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Jack led Lucy around, introducing her to the newsies. She nodded politely to each of them. As they approached the table where Spot sat, she couldn't help but smirk. He glared and she laughed. "Nice to meet you." She said smiling and holding out her hand.

"Yeah, I imagine it would be nice to meet me." He replied taking her hand as she laughed. "Nice to meet you too." He added.

Jack pulled a chair out for Lucy and sat in the empty one next to her. "Deal me in, Race."

"No, I don't feel like it." Replied an Italian boy. In spite of what he had said, he dealt Jack card his cards. Racetrack motioned a card to her as a way of asking her if she wanted to play. She nodded 'no' and sat back to watch. As the stakes rose and more money was lost and won, Lucy started pacing around the table. She found knowing everyone's hand was far more interesting than watching everyone play out their hands.

Spot was winning more than the other four boys, Jack, Racetrack, Skittery and Blink. Lucy found herself hovering behind him more often than anyone else. After winning a dollar, he turned around and said "You are officially my good luck charm." She smirked. "Jack, bring her more often."

Jack laughed, "Naw, you's stealin' my money because she's here. Plus she's always _too busy._"

"Well sorry I have two jobs." She said dryly.

"Two?" Spot asked.

"Yeah." She said shortly.

"Where are dey at?" He asked pulling out a cigarette.

"Erm, an actress in a Rodeo Show, and well a maid, a cook, a nanny and whatever, well whoever else the family I need works for." She tripped over her words.

"That's sounds more like," Spot paused and counted the jobs on his fingers, "At least four jobs."

She shrugged and said, "Life kinda revolves around work for me." Jack laughed sarcastically.

Looking at Jack and then back at Lucy, Spot said "If yer always workin', how do you two know each other?" At this point Jack's expression turned sour and Lucy laughed.

"She tried to kill me." Jack said flatly.

"What?" Spot asked, clearly alarmed. Lucy didn't really seem like the murdering type.

"Did not." Lucy said defensively. "I missed."

"So?" Jack said. The two began to argue while the newsies who had already been told this story laughed.

"Wait!" A very confused Spot commanded. The fighting stopped, but the laughter did not. "You tried to shoot him, but it missed?"

"Yes." Lucy replied as if it was no big deal.

"And somehow you two are friends after this?" The perplexed Brooklyn newsie asked.

"Yes." Jack said.

"Cowboy, I'm gonna need more than one word answers for this to start making sense."

Jack opened his mouth, but Lucy cut him off. "He tried to steal my horse."

"That wasn't nice. It's not a good t'ing to do." Race threw into the conversation while nodding knowingly.

Lucy smiled at him and continued, " After the show one night, I was talking to one of the girls in the show and my horse Cheeko was tied up behind me. All of a sudden some _insane_ kid in a cowboy hat jumps on him and takes off. Mind you, I tried screaming for him to come back. So I took the handgun I keep in my boot and shot it up above my head. I missed on purpose. The sound of a gunshot is the horse's cue to stop during the show ... so he stopped. Poor Jack went flying off and Cheeko came trottin' back to me." She chuckled along with the rest of the laughing boys and even Jack couldn't help but smirk a little. "So there was really no harm done."

"Yeah, until she threatened to call the bulls on me." Jack said. He was quickly getting over the embarrassment the story had brought on and was able to make fun of himself. Mimicking her voice, he said "'I'll call the police!' I was still having issues with Snyder at that point so I begged her not to rat me out."

"So, since he told me he was a newsie and that he couldn't have the police chasing him, the deal was he owed my a newspaper a day for a month."

"She's like that."

"You owed me." She said off-handedly. "Anyways, he found me after shows at night and gave me the paper and just got to be friends after that."

"Wow." Spot stated. "That's one hell of a way to get to know someone."

"I starved some nights 'cause a' this girl." Jack exaggerated.

"Oh, you did not!" She hit his arm. "It only cost you half of a penny and at least you weren't in the Refuge."

"No, no, no, Jack's right here. Blackmailin' a newsie out of der money and papes just ain't right." Spot said.

"I paid him back after the month. He didn't starve either." She rolled her eyes. "I'm not cruel. I helped him out with money during the strike, too."

"Alright, alright. I wasn't tryin' to offend." Spot said.

Lucy yawned and glancing at the grandfather clock in the corner of the room with a cracked face and she realized it was 2:30 in the morning. Jack turned to see what she was looking at and he too saw how late it was. "Jack!" She exclaimed. "I need to get home!"

"I know, I know." He said, sensing her urgency.

"Bye everyone! It was lovely meeting you."

As her and Jack rushed out of the building, Spot called out "What? Are you gonna turn into a pumpkin?"

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**Yeah, I know you're all already sick of the tennis excuse, but it does make updating harder. Either way my tennis season ends Wednesday so I might update faster after that ...? I'm not making any promises.**

**Much lurve to anyone who reviews.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Boo slow update! Yay beer ...um, by which I mean new chapter!**

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Jack and Lucy reached the Johnston's large brick townhouse within a few minutes of running, but it was 2:30 AM. "I have to be up and making breakfast in two and a half hours!" Lucy said, clearly stressed. 

"Say you're sick." Jack shrugged.

She nodded he head and said "I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"I can't lie."

"What?"

"What would my parents think?"

"Lucy, you know they don't think about you." She gaped at her friend in offended horror. She felt tears prick her eyes but she reused to let them fall. She turned away wordlessly and started climbing up the brick wall. Jack quickly picked up on his mistake and called after her, "No, that's not what I meant! Lucy!" He yelled up after her only to be ignored.

Lucy refused to face him and held her breath to keep a sob in her throat from escaping. She reached the second floor window of the bedroom she shared with the family's cook and other maid. She silently pushed the white-framed window open and swung her leg over the sill. Her bed had been strategically placed by the window and she slipped right in, not even taking of her boots. She glanced out the window to see Jack walking away running his hand through his sandy hair in frustration.

She lied in bed, not letting anymore unnecessary tears slid done her cheeks. She simply sighed, knowing what Jack had said was true. As much as she didn't want to believe him, she couldn't lie to herself. She had been disowned and tried to accept that she wasn't a part of her family's life anymore. What he had said hurt her just because she knew it was true.

When she failed trying to force herself to forget about it, she found her thoughts wandering towards Brooklyn's newsie leader. He was handsome, funny, and maybe a little too cocky. She let out a quiet laugh, realizing his self-assured attitude only attracted her to him more. She almost found it funny that after one evening with him she could want to see him again so badly even though he probably wouldn't even recognize her on the street.

It seemed like the moment she shut her eyes, the cook, Catalina, was shaking her.

"Wake up girl. Wake up!" She said frantically. Lucy was constantly annoyed by her busy-body personality. "We need to start on breakfast." She said with an uncalled for sense of urgency. Catalina started cooking too early every morning, but since she had worked in the house since she was 18 and she was now pushing 50 years old she was in charge of all the Johnston's staff.

Jack's advice sounded within her mind, but remembering what he had said afterwards she ignored it and forced herself to get up. She put on a plain gray dress and braided her carelessly. She couldn't stop yawning, not that it was unusual. She normally only got another three hours of sleep. Catalina led the way down the mahogany staircase and into the kitchen.

Before Lucy asked, Catalina told her they were making bacon, eggs and toast. "Simple enough. I'll got buy it." Lucy replied, whispering so she wouldn't wake anyone else up.

"Hurry, girl!" Catalina said and handed her three dollars. She sent her out to buy the bacon and eggs.

Lucy walked briskly through the kitchen, dining room, living room and parlor, out into the street. A block and a half later, she wished she would have brought a coat as the chilling autumn breezes made her eyes water and nipped at her face and hands. The streets were fairly quiet and empty as scattered groups people began to start a typical day for themselves before the sun was even up. She kept up a quick pace. Her strides became longer and faster when passing the World's distribution office, not wanting to see Jack even though she knew he wouldn't be up yet. Few newsies were up before dawn.

However, she would see a certain newsie leader, someone she hadn't expected. Instead of Jack, she saw Spot coming in her direction a block away. He was pressing a stack of papers against his side, seemingly heading back to Brooklyn. Instead of calling out the headlines, he walked up to individuals. He knew better than to yell first thing in the morning and annoy the people.

She felt a sudden shyness creep upon her and decided not to approach him. "He probably wouldn't even recognize you." She thought to herself again like she had before falling asleep. She continued walking, occasionally looking up at him. She She wanted to talk to him, but couldn't get up the nerve as they came closer and closer. She knew they would have to meet in the middle eventually.

They were only a few yards apart and she could feel her heart pounding. She prayed he would notice her. Then anticlimactically, he just walked past her without a glance in her direction. Instantly she felt stupid for expecting him to acknowledge her and unwillingly felt her heart sink.

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**Only the truly fabbity fab fab people leave reviews. If you want to be fabbity fab fab too, just call toll-free. 1800-CLICKTHEREVIEWBUTTON!**

**I don't what to tell you about my next update. It just won't be tomorrow. I'm having a Steeler party! Yeah, by the way, you better root for "dem Pixburgh Stillers tomorra'!"**


	5. Chapter 5

**Dear The Internet,**

**I'm not dead!**

**Love Always,**

**Kara**

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Lucy walked down the street, confusion and hurt inching further and further through her body. It became more of a physical feeling rather than an emotion. She could only remember feeling like that two other times. When that occurred to her, she shoved the memories out of her mind.

She, instead, contemplated what had happened moments ago, her sensible reasoning told to forget him. Although, the previous night she looked like, acted like and really was a different person. How could she expect him to recognize her? "But why would he?" She found herself thinking. But, all the while she told herself this, more hopeful ideas wove in and out of the sensible and pessimistic monologue in her mind. "'He might not have seen me at all' is right indeed, self." She thought to herself. "And so what if he didn't? It doesn't mean anything. He might be thinking about me too. He might be." She stated firmly, trying to convince herself that it was a possibility.

Buying food took very little time and she arrived back home unexpectedly early. Catalina was waiting for her when she entered the cluttered kitchen through the back door of the decadent townhouse. "You shouldn't be using that door. Back alleys aren't safe." Was her blunt greeting.

"That is **not** a dangerous alley." Lucy said sensibly. There was little to no 'blue collar crime' in behind upscale homes where brightly sunlit alleys were nearly wide enough to be roads of their own. Random murderers weren't attracted to stark white windows sills with bright flower boxes nearly pouring out of them. Starving thieves wouldn't risk breaking into the identical brick, connected houses.

"Any New York alley is a dangerous alley." The older woman replied with a frown.

Slightly nodding her head in disagreement, Lucy set the eggs and bacon on a small part of the counter where the woodwork was actually showing. Because the Johnston's never really used their own kitchen, none of their staff felt the need to keep it organized. Even straightened up, the room wouldn't look much better; it was dingy, too small and unlike the rest of the house wasn't made well or ornately. In fact, entering the dining room, which was brightly illuminated with a baroque chandelier and multiple windows almost hurt Lucy's eyes.

Humming to herself, Lucy unlocked the china cabinet and started setting the elaborate dining table. The white and blue place settings coordinated perfectly with the light blue walls, table cloth, and napkins. The chairs' upholstery bore the exact same pattern as the fragile pieces of china.

As usual, when Lucy had finished her task, Catalina refused to let her help cook. Whether it was from a lack of trust or space, Lucy was glad for it that morning. Her weariness from the lack sleep had hardly lifted. It probably increased after seeing Spot. She excused herself and went to take a quick ten minute nap on the red chaise lounge in the parlor.

Again she felt that she had just shut her eyes only to be awoken by the cook's violent poking. "Go wake everyone up." Rubbing her eyes, she abandoned the fluffy sofa. She strained to shake of her drowsiness and climbed the three flights of stairs.

Firstly she entered the room where she had slept soundly less than an hour ago. She carelessly woke up Hattie, a maid. Because she had a specific role unlike Lucy, she was not asked to prepare food and slept later. Next she went to the male servant's equally plain room. She woke both of the men, Jeffery, Catalina's husband, who served as the household's butler and Eric, like herself was employed to pick up any slack, only his time was often spent doing physical labor. Like she did every morning, Lucy couldn't help but blush seeing Eric, who was five years her senior, shirtless. He always noticed and always teased her.

Within an hour the servants and the family were in full swing. Mr. and Mrs. Johnston were invariably the first of the family to wake up and have breakfast served to them. Usually while they were still eating, Mrs. Johnston's mother, Ms. Swanson would join them and she was followed by Thomas, the oldest son, who was one year older than Lucy. Finally Hattie would bring the two toddlers, Tim and Susan, down from their bedrooms just in time to kiss their father goodbye when he left for work. Grace, the second oldest child at 12 years old, slept until lunch on a regular basis. After breakfast, Hattie would start the dishes, Catalina would start to prepare for lunch, and Ronald, Eric and Lucy would report to Mrs. Johnston to receive their duties for the day.

Ronald was almost always instructed to clean something, and such was the case that day. Eric was asked to fix the wheel of the family's carriage which was kept in a building along with everyone else in the neighborhood's with a group of 'community horses.' (The area's prime real estate had led to a lack of space and required most people to keep their coaches that way.) "Lucy, I would like you to help my mother while she shops." Mrs. Johnston said politely, earning a scowl from Ms. Swanson, who believed her daughter needed to be more assertive when dealing with her help.

"Rebekah, I **don't** need help shopping." She said, looking at Lucy disapprovingly. "Girl, why do you look so tired?" She barked.

"I slept poorly last night." Lucy lied, with as much courtesy as she could muster. Though she thought dishonesty was an unbecoming trait, she wasn't hurting anyone or cheating her way out of work.

"And why is that?" She continued to question harshly. "You were in bed early enough."

Keeping her face emotionless, Lucy inwardly scrambled for an answer. Reaching one she thought was plausible, she replied "My allergies kept me awake."

Turning her back to her after that, Ms. Swanson restated "I don't need help." With a haughty air.

"Alright then, mother. You can shop for yourself and she'll run some errands separately." Mrs. Johnston said, defeated. "Lucy, if I give you a list of things I need for a dinner party this evening, would you pick them up?"

Before ever getting a chance to answer, Lucy was cut off by, "Good God, Rebekah!" The elderly woman said with a greet deal of annoyance. "You don't ask her to, you tell her to."

"It doesn't make any difference." Her daughter retorted meekly.

With a sarcastic laugh, she questioned "It doesn't make a difference? Doesn't make a difference indeed. It is about respect!" Ms. Swanson began to ramble. In her opinion, it was a pity the way Mrs. Johnston's mother bossed her around with little regard for her feelings. Lucy had always appreciated the kindness she had received in the house. Lucy's cheeks flourished, as she uncomfortable with the situation. Noticing this, Mrs. Johnston slipped the list of things than needed done into Lucy's hand and silently bid her to leave.

Lucy walked away, slipping away Ms. Swanson's threatening presence.

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**Erm, not my favorite chapter. Reviews would cool and borderline awesome.**

**By the way, sorry about the slow update. I am way too easily distracted when I get to the computer to type. ...But hey wouldn't you be if you were as Fergalicious as me? P**


	6. Chapter 6

**Alrighty! New chapter!! I'm actually really excited to finally post this. It would have been up like 3 days sooner if it hadn't of been for some major technological difficulites involving 3 different computers and an alarm clock.**

**Well kiddos, enjoy.**

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The weather was turning out to be what Lucy always thought was beautiful. It was a crisp, clean cold. It wasn't wet or cloudy, but sunny as a summer day and only the chill in the air and few leaves on the city streets signified autumns impending end. That time of year always made her remember home, the way everyone was so happy then. The freshness of the late morning caused her to look back on the way her life used to be with a smile instead of hurt and diffidence in her choice to leave.

She glanced at the list and started off to pick up dresses Grace had bought but needed altered from the tailor. She found her thoughts drifting towards Spot and the previous evening and questioned herself as to why she had fallen for him so quickly. From the moment she walked into that room, he had her attention and now she was left to wonder if he had wanted it? He seemed to address only her when he spoke to the group. Was it just her imagination? Lucy couldn't help but smile, recalling his face. Half rough and half boyish, his features balanced perfectly. His sarcasm was highlighted by his intense eyes and almost comical smirk. There was no doubt about it, Lucy was enamored.

She entered the shop and picked up dresses quickly, avoiding uncomfortable small talk with the clerk. The list of errands was shorter the Lucy had assumed and she finished quickly. Every step that brought her closer to house caused a mix of emotions. She was going to spend the rest of the day cleaning and her hour of freedom outdoors was short lived, but Grace's dresses were a burden to her walking.

A petite girl with a haughty air that she'd inherited from her grandmother was waiting by the door impatiently when Lucy came through the sturdy oak front door. "Luccccy," She wined. Her voice was too high pitched and came from a mouth that was too large. "What took you so long?"

"I'm surprised to see you're up." The feigned politeness covering the annoyance was just enough to pass under Grace's constantly turned-up nose.

"Well, I am." She stated.

"What a shame." Lucy thought to herself.

"Let me see the new dresses." When Lucy didn't jump to obey her demand, she added, "**Now!**"

"Patience is a virtue." Lucy masked her annoyance poorly, but Grace wasn't paying enough attention to notice it.

"As are service, tact and cooperation. So far today, you haven't displayed any of these." The girl replied with a tone of self-satisfaction. Lucy frowned, refusing to believe she'd been outwitted by a 12 year old. "Now let me see!"

"Here." Lucy tossed the dresses towards the girl, utterly fed up with her.

"Hey!" Grace cried out as Lucy started to walk away. "If you're so virtuous, you should know respect is one too."

When Lucy entered the kitchen, she was massaging her temples.

Catalina gave her a knowing look. "Grace?" Entertained by the fact she could immediately tell what was bothering her, Lucy nodded with a slight chuckle. "She's been in quite the snit since she woke up. Ms. Swanson gave her a talkin' to 'bout her laziness first thing."

"The girl's going to turn out just like her." Lucy commented.

"It's a shame she doesn't take after her mother." Lucy nodded in agreement. Changing the subject, Catalina said, "What have you go to the rest of the day?"

Lucy shrugged. "I guess I'll ask Hattie."

"Hop to it then, Ms. Swanson won't be happy to come and see you in here with nothing to do. Hattie's upstairs I think." Lucy obeyed and headed up the narrow back staircase.

"Hattie?" She called out.

An "Over here." was heard from the master bedroom. Following it, Lucy met the 18 year old redhead there. "Morning Luce."

"Morning. What do you need help with?"

"I was thinking you could beat the rugs." Lucy inwardly frowned. She lacked the strength to effectively get the dirt off of the antique Persian rugs. "Eric already set them up on the clothesline. I think he already pulled out one of James' old tennis rackets too."

"Alright."Lucy replied irritably. She headed back down the back stairs again. She went out the kitchen door and into the small backyard. Hattie was right, the five rugs that were decorated the first floor of the Johnston home were lined up and James' tennis racket was leaned against the lone tree in the yard.

She picked up the racket and went to the first rug. She swung it hard and upon contact with the rug, a mushroom cloud of smoke appeared, causing her to cough. "Gross." She continued to hit it ferociously and cough, sneeze and gag. "We should really clean these more often." She thought to herself.

Lucy continued to hit the rugs mindlessly. She was working on the third one when James' walked into the fenced off backyard. "Hello." He said casually, with his school books tucked under his arm.

"Good morning." She stated before hitting the rug again, assuming the conversation was over.

"Hardly." He replied with a smile. She tilted her head in confusion. "It's nearly three o'clock."

"Really?" She said, somewhat shocked. She glanced towards the two finished rugs behind her in the line. "Two whole hours..." She muttered. James smiled at her.

"Do you need some help?" He set his books down on the iron garden bench.

Slightly taken aback, she nodded her head no. "It wouldn't be appropriate." Her job was to serve him and his job was to take over his fathers successful law firm, not help her beat rugs.

"No one would care." He shrugged. Before she could answer, he had her arm in his and he guided her to hit the rug. She turned around and looked up at him with a small laugh. He grinned down at her politely. They spent the next hour together and finished much sooner than Lucy would have by herself. She had found herself enjoying his friendly company."Thanks." She said with a shy smile.

"Anytime. I'm always glad to help ... and avoid doing homework. I'll let Eric know you're done so he can put the rugs back." He added with a wink. She smiled back and followed him into the kitchen. James was the only Johnston who used that door and he has never minded the disorderly state in the room. They were greeted by the inviting smell of the chicken dinner Catalina was making. Lucy stayed in the small, overheated room while James continued on, tipping his hat and revealing a blond head of hair as he left.

As soon as he was out of earshot, Catalina turned to her and smiled coyly. "And what were you two doing?"

"He just helped me finish up with my chores."

"It's not a common thing for home owners or their children to help the help." She teased. "Perhaps there was something more going on."

"I doubt it." Lucy said with an awkward laugh.

"We'll see." Catalina said, disconnectedly.

"How?" Lucy asked, but received no answer.

The rest of Lucy's evening went as usual. She helped Catalina finish cooking dinner while Eric brought the rugs back inside. At six, when Mr. Johnston returned home from work, the entire family sat down and was served by Jeffery. The rest of the help sat crowded in the kitchen, eating the same dinner, only theirs was less 'dressed up.'

After helping with the dishes, Lucy excuse herself and go to her room. There, she would set up her bed so it looked like it was her petite figure lying under the covers rather than the pillows that were actually there. She then packed her small bag with her show costume and as usual she threw in some dinner leftovers for Jack wrapped up in a cloth napkin and a small snack for Cheeko. She would usually sit on her window sill until Jack came.

Only, that particular night, Manhattans' newsies' own 'Cowboy' wasn't alone. Lucy's face lit up when she recognized who the second figure in the darkness was.

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**I won't insult your intelligence by saying 'Who could it be?' P Oh well, hope you liked this chapter and I hope even more that you'll review. Expect an update soon -- I'm in an uber good mood so it should be a happy chapter too! **


	7. Chapter 7

**Chyeah, longest chapter yet and the fastest update! I amaze myself.**

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Jack Kelly was not the kind of person who was prepared to be hit with a head from falling objects at any one moment, so needless to say when Lucy's bag fell on his head after it three story drop from her window he wasn't expecting it. "Jesus Christ!" He rubbed his head and looked up to see Lucy with her hand covering her mouth, which had fallen open.

She wasn't the only one with an open mouth. Spot Conlon, who stood next to Jack, had almost collapsed in his laughter. "Genius, Lucy. _Genius._" Was all he managed to get out.

"Jack," She said, half shocked and half apologetic. Her own guilt (and Spot's presence) had caused her to forget how angry she had been the night before. "I- I-" She scrambled for words as Jack started to climb up the ivy-covered wall towards her. "I'm so sorry. I'm so so _so_ sorry." He just nodded his head and continued climbing. "If it makes you feel any better, you got hit with you dinner." She swung her leg over the window sill. She refused to go any further than that unless someone was there to catch her if she slipped.

Jack reached the window and laughed. "You are unbelievable sometimes." He said with a smirk. Taking on a more serious air, he looked at her straight in the eye and said "I'm sorry about last night."

She climbed out of the window, avoiding looking down. (She'd made that mistake once and if Jack hadn't been there, it could have ended badly.) "I know you are."

"What does that mean?"

"It means..." She then realized she didn't know what it meant. "It means people make mistakes."

"And other people over react." He said in all seriousness.

"And then they forgive the people who made them over react." They both smiled and the two climbers started downwards and made it down easily.

When Lucy reached the bottom, she jumped away from the wall and turned around to see Spot. She inwardly beamed to see he had come. "Hi Spot."

"Heya Cinderella." They both smiled. "Did ya get home before midnight Cinderella?"

"Ha! Midnight? Nowhere close to midnight." She said. Without warning she started to walk away. Spot and Jack jogged a few steps to catch up and then resumed a comfortable walking pace.

"Well in the grand scheme of things, two hours isn't really a whole lot of time."

"Someone's feeling philosophical." She teased. "Oh by the way," She remembered his comment from the other night. "Cinderella didn't turn into a pumpkin. Her carriage did."

"Oh, well my sincerest apologies for not knowing my fairy tale details. I'll have to study up on it." He stated, his tone both playful and sarcastic.

She said equally playfully, "I'll consider forgiving you. Although," She paused for what she assumed was a dramatic pause. (Her companions didn't quite realize that was what she was going for.) "I wouldn't get my hopes of if I were you." Her voice changed to a frank manner of speaking to say "I take my fairy tales very seriously." And then smiled.

The trio reached the show arena and the boys followed Lucy into the narrow, busy and crowded 'backstage area.' She stopped in front of a door and waved them goodbye. "I'll see you soon."

After she was out of earshot, Jack said "Yeah, real soon. It takes at least a half of an hour. Can you imagine?"

"Naw I can't." Spot paused. "Man, I'll tell you what, that girl's something else." He rubbed his hand on the back of his head.

Jack looked at him skeptically, trying to distinguish what he meant. "I can't stop you from tryin' something, but dammit Conlon, you sure as hell better treat her right if you do."

"I can't see her being the kind of girl to take abuse she didn't deserve." Spot chuckled.

"You'd be surprised." He mumbled. Though he'd seen Lucy's best times and those were the ones that stuck out in his memory, it was the worst moments that made him worry about her with an almost brotherly feeling. She'd **had **suffered more than she deserved. As far as Jack was concerned families didn't do what they'd done to her, no matter what choice she'd made and regardless of what they believed in.

"Huh?" Spot asked pulling him out of his thoughts.

"Nothin'." He didn't think he was the right person to tell Spot. She was the only person who could tell him.

Meanwhile in the dressing room Lucy put on what she always said was a ridiculously shiny dress. (Jack always said it reminded him of one of Medda Larkson's, but he said hers was pink.) She thought everything in the show was too flashy, but it wasn't up to her. Tom's wife, Jessie came into the dressing room, ready to do Lucy's hair. Throughout the past months they had perfected a way to do her and hair and Jessie had her already curled hair into perfect spirals in a fifteen minutes. Finishing the costume off, Lucy pulled on blue tights and white boots thank matched the white detailing on the dress.

"Perfect." Jessie approved. "Big crowd tonight. Knock 'em dead out there."

Lucy nonverbally replied with a grin and a nod of her head. She followed Jessie out of the dressing room and was met by the two boys she'd come with.

"What do you think?" She said, feeling almost shy.

"Gorgeous." Spot said. Lucy blushed, but beamed also and Jack still looked unsure about what this was turning into.

Before anyone had a chance to say anything, Frank grabbed Lucy's arm and pulled her away, saying, "Cheeko won't let anyone tack him." Lucy turned around and smiled over her shoulder at Spot , who returned the look. She didn't however see Jack smack him in the back of the head.

"Are you kidding me?" She asked Frank. It wasn't like the people in charge of the horses were new to tacking.

"No." He seemed short and then she remembered the previous night's conversation with Tom.

Tom and several other people stood around Cheeko's stall, most with their arms crossed, looking annoyed. The horse's saddle was on and the girth was tightened. Seeing her, Tom said, "Damn horse won't take a bit. Watch." He commanded. He approached the horse with the bridle ready. The horse's ear pinned back and he snapped at Tom.

Lucy hoped the stall divided and took the bridle. She did what Tom had and got the same reaction. She grabbed Cheeko's face in both hands and said loudly "Hey!" This time when she came at him, instead of trying the bite her, he threw his head up beyond her reach. She passed the bridle to someone much taller than her and they managed to get the bit in his mouth.

"I swear that horse is a lunatic." Someone said.

"I know." Was her simple reply. She backed him out of the stall and mounted. Still irritated about having bit in, he reared and refused to listen. Lucy just held the reins loose and ignored his annoyance. She didn't ask him to do anything and let him fume.

"Atta girl." Frank said, rolling his eyes. "Alright let's get started." A group of three men on similar palominos galloped out, each proudly displaying an American flag. Another girl on foot followed and sang the national anthem to the rowdy crowd. As she held out the word "brave" at the end of the song, twenty riders entered the stadium and the show officially began.

Lucy walked Cheeko up to the entrance, but not far enough out that the audience could see them. Frank wordlessly helped her stand up into the specially shaped saddle. She raised up one foot and clicked her tongue at the horse below her. "Let's go."

The show went as usual. Lucy and Cheeko were mainly the center of attention and the show went pretty flawlessly. At one point when she jumped from Cheeko to another performers arms and almost slipped, but minor mishaps were expected in the show and it was covered up well. Normally the show ended all too quickly for Lucy, but tonight she was eager to see Spot afterwards and each sequence of tricks seemed to drag on. She was so preoccupied with thoughts of him, she paid virtually no attention to the audience. "_Just keep smiling._"She reminded herself.

The show finally ended and she was in the dressing room wiping the overdone make-up off of her face when someone knocked at her door. She got up to answer it, but when she opened the door she was met by Spot. Jack wasn't anywhere around.

"Be my girl?" Was all he said.

"What?" She asked, making sure she was hearing correctly. It seemed sort of sudden and certainly spontaneous.

"Be my girl." This time she couldn't tell if if was a command or a question.

She didn't need to reply to him. After she hugged him and pecked his lips, Spot assumed the answer was yes. When she pulled away, he put his strong arms around her waist and kissed her longer and harder than she had been expecting. Through their connected lips, Spot felt her smile.

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**Too fluffy? I hope not, but hey you tell me. (That means review, dammit.)**

**Now you're going to have to excuse me ... there's pie waiting for me. )**


	8. Chapter 8

**It's an update. Wee?**

**I hope everyone had a _marvelous _holiday. Holiday insanity slow update apologetic author me.**

**Well enjoy.**

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A few weeks passed and anyone close to her noticed a definite change in Lucy. Only the difference in their friend, co-worker, employee or love-interest was dissimilar in each of their eyes.

In the Johnston household, Hattie and Catalina were losing patience with her constant, new-found fatigue. During the day, in between her chores Lucy could be found leaning against walls and slipping in and out of delicate naps with the biggest dream-induced smile plastered to her features. Her once stunning work ethic was leaving much to be desired. They, of course, didn't realize her sloth came from the adjustment from already late nights at the rodeo to even later ones with Spot.

They weren't the only people in the Johnston house to notice the sudden change in Lucy. James grew increasingly concerned for her. Since she had arrived to work in his family's home, the older boy had been attracted to her soft face and not often enough seen smile. As he had come to know her better, he realized she was also surprisingly intelligent for her social class. Lately he was consumed with anxiety and pity that was the result of the way the dark circles under her eyes popped against her almost sickly pale skin. She looked ill and worried such an unusual amount that he would later mistake this compassion for love.

Jack watched his usually timid friend open up, become less serious and he couldn't help but notice how she seemed happier. Nonetheless, he still watched out for her relentlessly. Spot was still receiving don't-you-dare-hurt-hers constantly. While Jack was happy for her, he refused to let her be mistreated.

Spot had loved being with her from the beginning. She was definitely not his first girlfriend but he thought she was certainly different then some of the previous girls. Lucy never played hard to get, but at the same time she was never embarrassed to tell him she felt like going home instead of going out anywhere with him. The nights after the show when she would inform she wouldn't go anywhere but the Johnston's and stubbornly would not change her mind, still shocked him. He compared it to her slapping him in the face, but in the humor of her refusals, kissing the same spot she'd hit to make it feel better. Lucy was a lot of things, but stereotypical was not one of them.

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Lucy sat tucked away in a kitchen corner and hummed to herself as she did the family's laundry. She jumped and dropped the shirt she'd been trying to get a stain out of back into the bucket when Grace unexpectedly burst in from the dining room. Lucy couldn't help but wonder if that was the first time she had ever seen her own kitchen. It seemed bizarre yet plausible at the same time. The two girls stared at each other wordlessly, each eying the other skeptically.

Breaking their silence, Lucy questioned "Shouldn't you be in school right now?"

"It's Saturday, you idiot." Grace stated rudely.

Instead of retorting, Lucy examined the twelve year old girl as if staring at her long enough would answer her next question. Realizing that Grace's black stare would give nothing away, she asked "Why are you so angry all of the time?"

"I'm not angry. I just don't like you." Grace answered, emotionless.

"What don't you like about be?"

Grace had never been aimlessly malicious and there was in fact a reason behind her unbridled and ruthless mistreatment towards the youngest maid in the house. She would have treated Lucy just the same as Hattie and Catalina had she not noticed the way James looked at her. Naturally, she disliked her for it and felt almost jealous of the girl who had stolen the attention of her brother from her. Of course, she wasn't about to tell that to Lucy and instead replied by saying, "What **is** there to like?" With that, she skipped out into the yard.

Lucy had always had a respect deep, deep down for Grace as bratty as she could be. The girl definitely had spunk. She'd actually modeled some of the girl's behaviors into ones she used at the rodeo. While Grace went out to play in the backyard, Lucy let out an amused sigh. She had vowed from their first unpleasant encounter not to let Grace's insults have any effect on her.

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Thanksgiving rolled around quickly that year and anyone working for the Johnstons would have said the week leading up to it was by far the most hectic of the year. It was a long upstanding tradition for the family to host a large and formal dinner in the house. When Spot and Jack had arrived to pick Lucy up, she told them she was entirely too exhausted to do a show that night. After trying to convince her to go to no avail, the boys went to tell Tom that she was sick and the doctor had told her to stay in bed for a week. Her understudy gladly played her part.

While Lucy and Hattie polished the silverware in the dining room one afternoon, they talked about Hattie's fiancée, Jared and the wedding plans. James entered the front door of the house and asked Lucy if he could speak with her. Hattie raised her eyebrows and she returned a confused expression of her own. Lucy grabbed a dish towel and quickly dried her hands then proceeded to follow James into the airy sitting room.

"Can I help you Mr. Johnston?" Lucy stared at the floor as she spoke. She felt awkward and shy for a reason she couldn't quite put her finger on.

"Well, I-I was wondering," Lucy wondered why he sounded so nervous. "Well, um, you know about the Thanksgiving dinner, right?"

"Yes sir." She replied respectfully, even though his question was utterly ridiculous.

"Well, my grandmother, well she said I have to have a girl to escort." He paused and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Oh." Lucy knew what was coming next.

"Would you come with me?" He blurted out, hurriedly. "Please." He added as an afterthought.

_Tell him 'no.' Tell him you can't. Spot would be so mad. He would never believe it was an innocent dinner party. He'd probably kill James. Oh, come up with an excuse self. You have to come up with one. Oh, Lord in heaven, please, please give me an excuse. A reasonable one, if you would. I don't want to hurt his feelings. _Her thoughts came in rapid succession, when a reason to say no suddenly popped into her head.

"James, I don't have anything that I could wear and Catalina will need my help."

"I've already asked Cat if you could be excused from helping that evening and as for a dress, you are probably around the same size as my mother. I'm sure she wouldn't mind letting you use a dress of hers. If the dresses don't fit, I'd be happy to have them tailored."

_Oh, why do you have to be so nice? Lucy, you can do this, girl. Just gently let him know you are seeing someone else. Tell him! Why aren't you telling him? Don't look at his sad puppy dog eyes. Don't do it! Oh no, I did it. _

"Oh, well," She paused searching her head for the words to say. "I'd be happy to go with you." James smiled charmingly and thanked her. He left the room without another word.

_That was **not** what you were supposed to say. Spot is going to kill someone. If he finds out..._

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**Well my homeslices, whaddaya think? Reviews couldn't be more appreciated.**

**If I don't go to my friend's vacation house for New Years, I'll probably get another update up by 2007. If not, have a wonderful New Years and see 2006 out with a bang and live it up in 2007! ;o)**


	9. Chapter 9

**_My home dawgs_, I am so sorry I took a gazillion years, 3 hours and 17 minutes to post something. I hope you guys will still review, but my expectation for reviews on this chapter is admittedly low_low_low.**

**(By the way, yes, I did just refer to you as one of my home dawgs.)**

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Lucy was laying awake in bed when Hattie came into their shared room and flicked on one of the lamps. Lucy had been avoiding her since James had pulled her aside early that day. "What happened this morning?" She demanded in a friendly enough tone. 

"Immasleep." Was the only mumbled reply Lucy gave, whining into her pillow. She hoped Hattie wasn't feeling persistent enough to push the subject.

"Lucy, tell me." She said. "You know you can tell me." She tried to coax an answer out of the younger girl. Suddenly a thought hit her and she asked "They didn't fire you did they?" with a voice full of concern.

"I wish."

"What? What could he say that's worse?"

Lucy sighed. "It wasn't _terrible,_ but then again, it was. Well maybe it wasn't, but it was just ...** bad**." She was frustrated with her on indecision. "I guess it wouldn't have been bad six weeks ago, but now..." She sighed again.

"Luce," When Hattie said that Lucy couldn't help but being reminded of Luce being Spot's name for her. "You are killing me. I'm dying to know what happened." She was losing patience quickly as curiosity got the best of her.

"James asked me to escort me to that stupid, stupid dinner."

Before Lucy could continue, she was interrupted by Hattie's high pitched squeal. "That's fantastic! ...Well for you, not so much for me. It means more work." She laughed but her chuckle was quickly replaced by a confused frown. "Why is this a bad thing?"

"Because I'm already seeing someone. He's going to be so mad at me."

"Did you already agree to go with James?"

"Yes. I didn't mean to, but I did."

"Oh. Well, no getting out of this now. Who says that -" She paused and waited for Lucy to tell her the boy's name.

"Spot."

"Yes, well who says that Spot has to know." When Lucy made no reply, while inspecting her finger nails she conversationally asked, "Spot's not exactly a common name. He isn't _the _Spot Conlon, is he?"

Lucy couldn't help but smile with a little bit of pride. "Yes, that's him."

"Oh, how scandalous." She said dramatically as she leaned back against the wall. "I almost hope he finds out. It'd certainly be interesting, to say the least."

"Well thanks for the kind thought. You're such a pal." Lucy said sarcastically, but with a laugh.

"That's what I'm here for."

A few nights later, after two busy days of preparing not only the house but a dress for the upcoming dinner, Lucy heard a tap on the window next to her bed. She bolted up while Hattie and Catalina slept on soundly. She looked out and in the yard she could see the form of someone she'd been desperately hoping she could avoid for the next few days, but at the same time missed terribly. Her stomach seemed to do a back-flip as thousands of little butterflies materialized in its confines. Presuming she'd already been seen and that it was too late to pretend she was still asleep, she waved down to Spot.

"Come down." He said just loud enough for her to hear. When she nodded her head no, he thought it was because she wouldn't climb alone. He began to head up the wall and while he did so, Lucy checked to see that both of the other women were still asleep and shoved the window open. She was greeted by the cold November air and a kiss from Spot as he leaned in towards her. She pulled away after a moment, and beamed at him despite her nerves. Lucy grabbed a coat and swung herself outside. Closing the window behind her, she followed closely behind Spot as they descended the wall.

When they reached the bottom, she smiled nervously. Spot pulled her close to him. "I missed ya." He said softly into her hair with a tone that was meant to explain his unexpected arrival.

"Missed you too." She said. She felt guilty about James and the dinner as she nuzzled her face into his shoulder affectionately. Lucy wondered if she'd be able to avoid telling him about it all night. Her heart was pounding out of control and she realized keeping something like that from Spot wasn't right. She did however decide it would be best, for her at least, to delay telling him as long as she could and enjoy the evening with him for the time being.

"Let's go." He said.

"Where?" She asked, calming her nerves.

Instead of saying anything, he shrugged, obviously not having any plan and took her hand.

The darkness around them deepened as the sun set and they walked hand in hand and in silence. Spot found the quiet to be comfortable and easy, but it was driving Lucy insane. She felt like he already knew something was wrong.

"Lucy?" He asked, breaking their silence. _Here it comes_. She could tell that he was about to ask her something serious. "Where's you family?

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**Basically, I still don't know if I like that ending to the chapter. Either way...**

**Reviews **_equal _**Love**

**Next Chapter **_equals_ **Coming Soon**

**Story** _equals_ **Mapped out so I can finish it faster and writer's block doesn't happen ... again.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Fast-ish update ... well for me.**

**I was kinda sad about the lack of review-age on the last chapter at first and then I was like, "Wait, yeah I totally deserved that." Big thanks to xoborogrlxo for being genuinly kick-ass.**

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Lucy was admittedly shocked by the question. For the first time that evening, her thoughts weren't consumed with the need to tell Spot about James and the dinner. She frowned against her own will and Spot noticed her hesitance. He took her by the arm, stopping their walk, and turned her towards him. With his hands resting on her upper arms and looking her straight in the eye, he said "You know you don't have to talk about this if you don't want, right?" His voice was filled with compassion, something unfamiliar to all other people besides Lucy.

"I know, but I don't mind, really." She started walking around the same block they'd been circling again and Spot followed quickly to fall back into step with her. He felt that she was lying, but said nothing; his curiosity had overpowered the best of him. "I actually," She stopped and let out an ironic laugh laced with loneliness rather than humor.

She started again, rewording her statement, "My family, they're in Lancaster." She paused and looked at Spot, hoping he would get the point. His expression informed her other wise. "They're Amish." She again glanced at Spot out of the corner of her eyes. He looked surprised. It wasn't anything like any of the possible answers he had been expecting. "I left when I was fifteen, and now," She looked at her feet uncomfortably. Spot rubbed her back reassuringly and but he still hoped she'd continue. "Now, I can't see them again. I tried going back last summer and it was like I was invisible. The only reaction I got from anyone was my father and brothers looking embarrassed and my mother just kept crying, but no one would speak to me. They were so ashamed of me." Her voice cracked when she said the last part but she refused to let any tears form in her eyes.

Spot searched his head for something comforting to say, but all he could come up with was "Why'd you leave?" He saw her give him an sad but irritated look and he instantly knew it had been the wrong thing to say. Just because he spoke compassionately to her didn't mean he was a sensitive person.

She sighed and wondered if she should lie or not. Lucy knew he wouldn't respect her reason, if that's what she dared to call it. Whether it was in trying to get him to say something comforting or because she felt she owed it to him and confessed, "I was bored. I was so bored."

In the poor lighting from the street lights that were spaced out too far from each other, she thought she saw a look of disgust. Though he'd never told her in detail about his childhood and she knew it hadn't been a happy one. How could he not think of her as a fool for leaving a stable, loving home? Spot said nothing but all she wanted to hear was him tell her what she had done was okay; that she wasn't selfish; that he respected her decision. She'd longed to hear it from anyone for months and coming from Spot it would mean everything to her. Though she hated to admit it, she knew he would not say it. In fact, he thought just the opposite from the way he stared at the ground and kicked a rock, clearly frustrated.

"Will you just say something?" She cried out.

Spot switched his glare from the road to Lucy. "What do you want me to say?" He said, even more angry than she'd anticipated. Despite her new found indifference towards him, she was frightened by his harsh tone. "I mean, you sound like a spoiled brat right now."

"Don't call me names!" She said, knowing she sounded childish, but who was he to say that?

"Well, it's what you sound like. You want me to lie to you and say I think it's just great that you walked out on a family that cared about you? I ain't gonna say that! No one ever did nothin' to ya and ya just decided ta up an' leave 'em?" By this point he was yelling and his accent was even more exaggerated than usual. "Ya just spit on everyt'ing dey eva did for ya and I'm supposed to give you a pat on da back and kiss ya goodnight? I woulda loved ta be in yer situation, and you jus' took it for granted."

"Oh, because this is all about you, right? Well hey, why not? You're the great Spot Conlon. You're self-centered and insensitive and I don't want to see you again." She matched his volume as best as she could and stormed off down the street. Stopping after walking ten feet, she called back, "Oh by the way, I meant to tell you sometime tonight, I'm going to a formal dinner with my boss's son tomorrow night." Rather than the guilt she had thought was going to fill her after saying that, she felt a spiteful pride. She felt she'd nailed him and was content to go home.

As she turned around to start walking, she heard him yell, "You're going where?" If Lucy had thought he was loud before, he'd blown her way with the last question. It was at that exact moment, she knew she had won.

With a malicious smirk, she resumed walking. Spot could be heard stomping up behind her and raging at the same time. He called her things that made him calling her a brat before seem like it had been an endearment. He threatened James, whom he had designated "the other guy." He demanded more information. Lucy said nothing in reply and continued to walk with a coolness that contrasted the adrenaline rush she was experiencing.

When they reached the Johnston's yard and she made to climb the wall by herself for the first time, he grabbed her arm and spun her to face him for the second time that night, only this time much more violently. The excessive force he used terrified Lucy but she tried to conceal it. "I was talkin' ta you, goil." When she still made no reply, his grip on her arm tightened.

"What are ya gonna do, hit me Spot? I guarantee that it would **not **this better." She tried to sound fearless but her voice was high-pitched and scared.

Spot heard the fear and, as angry as he was, he was shocked that she had thought he would ever hurt her. He let go and threw his hands in the air.

"You're an ass." Was the last thing Lucy said to his retreating figure before ascending the wall by herself. Before she was even a quarter of the way up, the anger that had made her so vindictive only moments before had faded and she was choking back tears by the time she reached her bed.

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**Angry, angry kids.**

**Ooookay, so the big goal with this chapter was not to make there be a bad guy and a good guy so I hope it worked. **

**Reviews would be fabulous.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Slow update because I suck. Yep.**

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Lucy laid in bed all night, furious and upset. Eventually her eyes were depleted of frustrated tears, but the hurt she felt didn't dwindle. At first she held him responsible. _How could he?_ She questioned his actions continually, but refused to place any blame upon herself. However, the more she reviewed their argument, the more reasonable she became. She knew bringing up James like that was below the belt, but were his comments any more fair? She subconciously knew it had been both of their faults. 

Unable to sleep and knowing trying was useless, she wandered downstairs and into the sitting room. She stretched out on the plush embroidered couch and just laid there. Moments when she could relax in this house were few and far between. The more she thought about it, the more she realized times of calm laziness in her life in general, such as that one, were rare occurrences. She pulled her knees to her chin when she finally admitted to herself in a soft whisper, "This is too much." She always known she'd eventually need to give part of her life up but saying it made it real and it made it suddenly and urgently necessary. She was going to crash if she didn't slow down. Suddenly overwhelmed and exhausted, she sobbed uncontrollably and couldn't stifle her own weeping.

She didn't know how long her breakdown went on, but when the sun could be seen rising she got up and went back to her bed. She'd been instructed to sleep in late today so she'd be well-rested. She snorted at the irony as she laid back down and closed her eyes to at least mock-sleep. She heard Catalina and Hattie rise and get ready quietly as not to disturb her "slumber."

Roughly two hours later, Mrs. Johnston came to wake her. Lightly touching her shoulder she said her name. Sitting up, she rubbed her eyes. "The bath tub in the master bedroom's bathroom is ready for you. When you're done, Catalina, my mother and I will be happy to help you get ready," was all she said and exited the room. Lucy reluctantly got out of bed, none too eager to start the day. She found herself thinking, "_What's the point?_"

She carelessly walked downstairs and into the Johnstons' then vacant master bedroom that was adjacent to the bathroom where she'd been told to go. It was much nicer than the one in the servants' attic. It seemed everything was made of marble or metallic. She'd seen, and cleaned, it many times but the prospect of using it had never been plausible enough to even consider. Yet, there she was lounging in the tub that between her sour mood and already simplistic taste seemed like too much for something as practical as a bathtub.

She finished quickly and wrapped herself in a fluffy robe that had been laid out for her. She could here the indistinct chatter of the three women outside of the door and slowly turned the knob. All smiled at her but only Catalina could notice and react to her bitterness. Lucy felt as though she was one of Grace's porcelain dolls while the three woman set to fixing her hair. They carelessly pulled at her hair with towels, brushes and combs in an effort to flatten it's excessive volume. When she made no protest to their yanking, they increased it assuming she was still comfortable. Soon half of it was pulled up into an ornate bun and the other bottom layers were left in their natural curls.

When her hair was at least dry, Mrs. Johnston pulled out a cap-sleeved dress from her enormous closet. It was an awful shade of green in Lucy's unvoiced opinion but she was informed it was not only stylish, but becoming against her untanned skin. They all aided her in slipping into it and tying the complicated ribbons that decorated and held the dress together. Lucy felt ugly and lost within the flowing silky fabric, but her disdain towards the dress and the situation was contrasted by Catalina's and Mrs. Johnston's compliments. Ms. Swanson was silent.

Grace entered the room while the woman searched a jewelery box for the perfect necklace, thinking that it was incredibly important to Lucy; she couldn't have cared less. Grace gasped at her mother, "What is _she _doing in your dress?" Lucy realized that no one had told Grace about her attendance.

"James and _Lucy_ are going to the dinner together tonight." She discreetly and unsuccessfully chastised Grace for her lack of respect.

"What?" She shrieked. James who sat in the next room, came to see what the fuss was and leaned against the door. What happened next was the first time Grace showed her malice towards Lucy to anyone but her grandmother and her victim and the first time anyone had seen Mrs. Johnston absolutely and truly enraged. Grace turned to face James and began to pound on his chest angrily. "No, I hate her. You can't like her! I hate her!" She yelled. Jame's looked confused but not at all pained by his younger sister's weak but passion-driven blows. This scene was quickly ended as Mrs. Johnston grabbed Grace's arm and yanked her out of the room. Everyone could hear Mrs. Johnston yell at Grace calling her a spoiled brat and informing her that she would not be permitted out of her room for the rest of the day.

"What about the dinner?" She whined. It was the first year that she was going to be allowed to attend, as she was now considered old enough to behave.

Her mother snorted and said "You're obviously far too childish to go. You will stay in your room."

Angry, Grace made her second mistake of the day by saying, "Well fine. It's not like it's a punishment anyways. I've got all of my dolls and toys." Lucy couldn't imagine why Grace had thought that this was an intelligent thing to say, knowing as it was said what was to come next.

"Thank you for pointing that out. You will just have to stay in the guest room." She once again took her daughter with no delicacy by the wrist whatsoever and led her away.

While this went on, the other four people remained in their places stunned at either Grace's behavior or her mother's fury.

"I-I," James gaped slightly. "I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over her. You know she doesn't hate you."

Masking the sarcasm in her voice quite well, Lucy said, "I'm sure she's was just feeling overwhelmed about tonight and her nerves got the best of her."

He nodded his head slightly in agreement and took his leave. The three remaining occupants of the room sat in an awkward silence. Soon one of the toddlers began to cry, and even though Hattie was with them, Catalina excused herself to go take care of the problem.

Ms. Swanson rose in a stately manner and with a haughty air, hissed quietly, "I almost had the same reaction. You're an embarrassment." Lucy took this insult as gracefully as she could. She appeared to remain unaffected and indifferent, although, at that very moment she decided she would tell James she couldn't go with him.

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**Erm... what did you think?**


	12. Chapter 12

**Haha, yet another chapter that took forever to post. So here it is... **

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"Is it because of Gracey? Really, don't worry about her. She's just-" James paused in his pleading after Lucy had told him she couldn't go with him. "You look beautiful." 

Lucy met his oddly timed compliment with a somewhat sympathetic smile. She gave him another untrue excuse. "I just don't think it's appropriate for you to take your employee."

"No one besides my family would have to know." As he said this Lucy knew if she went this is how their relationship would always be. He'd always be embarrassed by her social and economic rank and try to hide it from his high-society friends.

She frowned, "No. This is silly."

It was James's turn to frown. He didn't think his affection for her was _silly. _"Please, I'll be a laughing stock if I go alone. It's too late to find anyone else."

Something about his statement bothered her. She felt used but as Lucy glanced at the clock she realized it was true. Guests would begin to arrive within the hour. She sighed, "I just don't know..."

"Please."

Lucy massaged her temples. She thought with a cynical sense of humor that she'd been doing a lot of that lately. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt."

James hugged her rather awkwardly and thanked her.

* * *

Spot had been pacing the length of the Brooklyn Bridge for most of his day. Rather than selling his newspapers, he contemplated his situation with Lucy with some irritation and less compassion. He found himself blaming Lucy for all of the problems he had been encountering lately. It was her fault he hadn't sold enough papers in days. It was her fault he could hardly afford food. It was her fault he couldn't even eat the meager meals he bought. It was her fault that he wasn't sleeping at night. It was her fault he couldn't concentrate on anything. It was her fault that she was all he thought about. 

He wondered if Jack could help at all. Jack knew nothing about their fight, but his threat from the beginning of Spot's involvement with Lucy left Spot indecisive about turning to him.

* * *

Standing in the over-sized townhouse's foyer, Lucy feet began to ache. Mrs. Johnston's shoes were too small for her and she felt as if she'd been standing with the family greeting guests for hours. Glancing at the clock in the adjoining parlor, she saw it had only been 35 minutes. The task of welcoming everyone had been assigned to her and James. It was extremely uncomfortable for making small talk with strangers was not her forte. She caught herself wishing it was Spot standing next to her rather than James but pushed the thought out of her head.

* * *

As Jack scowled at him after hearing his story, Spot decided going to Jack had been a bad idea. The great Spot Conlon was squirming and eager to leave Jack's angry presence. Although he felt assured that he could take Kelly if it came to it, he didn't think busting her friend's face would help Lucy along on the road to forgiveness should she choose to take it. "Listen, I'm just gonna go." Spot said. 

"No, we're gonna fix this." Jack said after collecting himself.

"_We?_"

"Yeah, **we. **Can't-cha hear good no more?" He was frustrated and Spot was trying his last nerve with stupid questions.

* * *

After an eternity in Lucy's mind, everyone was seated. Chatter buzzed around her as dinner was served but she didn't take part in it. James sat to her right and to her left, where Grace's seat would have been, was a vacant chair. She smirked at thought of what kind of revenge Grace sat in her room plotting. 

Looking around she observed the Johnston family. Mr. Johnston carried himself in a very professional way; Lucy couldn't remember an instance when he hadn't. Ms. Swanson acted so stately one would never have guessed she'd only escaped poverty through her daughter's marriage into wealth. Mrs. Johnston beamed and laughed. The day's earlier events were forgotten for the time being. James chatted with a girl on his other side. Even though she had never felt anything for him, she found herself feeling betrayed and somewhat abandoned. He had left her to face the table of strangers by herself, much to Ms. Swanson's joy she was sure. They came off as being so put together, so perfect. It caused her to reflect on their problems and the falsity of their unity upset her. She didn't really know why either.

"Are you okay?" Someone whispered in her ear while placing another plate in front of her. Lucy turned around to see Hattie's smiling face. Lucy had every intention of nodding the affirmative but her neck had other plans for her. Hattie's grin died on her lips. "Come to the kitchen when you get a moment." She said with worry laced through her quiet words.

A few moments later Lucy excused herself and went into the kitchen. Hattie and Catalina rushed towards her and as they did she felt tears prick her eyes.

It was too much. The inevitable collapse of living a double life was finally here. She came to the conclusion that due to her lies, her exhaustion, and her stress she had lost the best part of her life, possibly for good. She felt hopeless as she wondered if Spot would ever come back for her.

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**Well kiddos ... what did you think?**

**(I'd love reviews but don't honestly have high expectations for this chapter. Personally I don't like it all that much.)**


	13. Chapter 13

**A fast update! I know, I know. What can I say? I'm freakin' awesome.**

**So, I'm getting ready to finish this off. I've already got the first chapters written for 2 stories and I'm deciding which one to add on and post next. **

**Reviews would be mad awesome. (Yeah, I just said 'mad awesome'; what do you intend to do about it?) Thanks to my two fabulous reviewers Harmony Remarc and ****Facetiouslymischievious**

* * *

Jack thought long and hard about whether to punch Spot in the face. It seemed justified, waht with the way he talked to Lucy. Though he felt assured he could work the scrawny kid over, he didn't think it would make Lucy happy. Although, maybe it would...

"Listen, I'm gonna go talk to her tonight. I'll figure out what she wants and let you know. She either misses you or she's happy with the rich kid. I doubt the second."

This sparked some hope in Spot. He was about to open his mouth when he was interrupted.

"You're such an ass." Jack said, reflecting on his friends' argument.

"What was I supposed to do?"

"Not act like an ass."

* * *

"Lucy, what's wrong?" Hattie stood before Lucy unsure how to comfort the teary faced girl. 

"I-I just don't feel well. I think I need to go bed." Lucy lied.

"I'll let James know." Hattie excused herself.

Catalina watched Lucy with a mix of pity, curiosity and indifference towards her. She worried about this girl who was clearly not ready for the adult world she'd been thrown into the past year. The older woman wondered why she acted as she did, but felt that she brought it upon herself.

"Girl." She said getting Lucy's attention. "Something needs to change." From the second week Lucy had worked in the house, Catalina had noticed her sneaking out, but never said a word about it. At first she assumed the girl wasn't nearly as _respectable_ as the other inhabitants of the house thought she was but after getting to know her better, she decided that prostitution wasn't Lucy's late night hobby.

"What?" Lucy was taken aback. Could she possibly know?

"I don't know where you go out at night, but you can't keep it up. You'll have to give something up eventually."

Lucy held in whimper. "I know." Her tears increased and small choked noises came from her throat. Catalina pulled her into a hug.

"It's going to be okay. I promise."

Lucy didn't believe her. She felt trapped.

* * *

"You ain't coming." Jack said irritatedly. The two boys were walking towards Brooklyn. 

Spot didn't appreciate the way Jack was talking down to him. He'd been doing it all evening. "Yes I am."

"You'll just make her mad." This was already a hassle in Jack's mind and bringing Spot along would make the whole situation even more complicated.

"How do you know?" Spot's childish words were spoked with a gruff, combative tone.

"I just do." Jack was growing more and more annoyed.

"She might have forgiven me. She wouldn't be mad at me then." He really believed this was a possibility.

"She'd still wouldn't want to see you. Not yet at least." Jack knew Lucy too well to think she'd go running back into Spot's arms. "Go home Spot."

* * *

Lucy had spent at least a half an hour scrubbing her face to get off the various powders and creams that Mrs. Johnston had applied that afternoon. She pulled off the cap-sleeved, floor length dress and replaced it with a nightgown. It was only six thirty in the evening but it was dark and she was exhausted. 

She had barely laid down and gotten comfortable when she heard voices from outside of her window. Assuming it was just some people from the party she ignored it. She had almost fallen asleep when someone's statement caught her ear.

"Spot, what the hell? I told ya to go home."

"_Spot?_" She wondered if she'd finally lost her mind. "_Would it be all that surprising if I went insane?_" She sat up and looked out into the back yard. Her heart skipped a beat. She was shocked to see Jack and Spot below her, unaware that she was watching. They seemed to be arguing.

"Go home!"

"No! Nobody tells Brooklyn where to go." Lucy smirked against her will. It was definitely Spot.

"Shut up and leave. You aren't gonna be able make this better until I figure out how she is."

"Coming to you was officially a stupid idea. You ain't helping at all. She isn't gonna think I care if I send somebody else." His tone had originally been angry but it had faltered with his final statement. It took a moment for Lucy to recognize what it was but realized it was almost desperation.

"I know you want her back but she needs time." Jack had calmed somewhat but he still seemed annoyed.

"I need her! Jack, you don't get it. I can't sell, I can't eat and I can't even sleep. I think I ... _love _her." Lucy gasped and even though she was furious with him, the butterflies living in her stomach that had disappeared in the past week returned instantly.

It appeared that Jack didn't know what to say back. It wasn't like Spot to gush like that. He pretended he hadn't said anything. "I'm tryin' to help you. Just go home."

Lucy watched them as if they were acting out a play. She didn't want Spot to leave, but he finally did what Jack told to and left the yard.

Jack quickly climbed the wall and was surprised to see Lucy waiting for him with a dull lamp lit.

"Shouldn't you be-" He questioned.

"No. I shouldn't be."

"I thought that you'd still be down there." He then noticed that her eyes looked red and puffy he asked, "What happened?"

His inquiry made Lucy wonder exactly what _had _happened. She felt as if her life had suddenly spiraled out of her control. "I don't really want to talk about it right now."

Changing the subject, she said "I heard you and Spot."

Jack looked surprised for the second time. "Really?" She nodded. "It's probably better that way. I had no idea what I was supposed to say. I think he pretty much said everything he needed to."

"Yeah, I guess." The two sat on Lucy's bed without saying anything. Suddenly Lucy heard footsteps. "You need to go."

"Huh?"

"Leave!" She hissed urgently. "Someone's coming."

He moved quickly and within a few seconds he was out the window. "You okay?"

"Not right now, but I will be." She said with a half-hearted smile.

"You goin' back to Tom's tomorrow?"

"Yeah. You'll come?"

"Yeah. Should I bring Spot?"

"No, I'm still not ready to talk to him." She was reassured that he cared enough to wait another day. "I need to think about this a little while longer." She noticed Jack smirk triumphantly as if she had just proved him right about something.

"I'll see ya." He left only seconds before Eric's distinctive knock could be heard against the door.

"Dessert, Luce? Cat saved you some."

"No thanks." She felt her evening had already been finished with something better than anything a dessert could have provided.

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**Too sappy? Yeah, probably. Oh well, a little (perhaps a lot of?) sappy-ness never hurt anyone. (Unless we're refering to syrup... then we're on a whole different subject.)**

**Also, I've got a bone to pick (I've wanted to say that for sooo long) with some people. There's people who have this story on their alerts/favorites and have never reviewed. It makes me muy muy sad that they won't take 30 seconds to let me know if they like or disliked the story. ( Hurumph. (Not that I'm begging for reviews or anything. P)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Ow! Ow! I'm on updating fire!**

**This chapter is a little short, but meh - it happens. Hope yinz like it!**

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Lucy woke up feeling lighter than she had in weeks. She tried not to smile too much; though she wanted to, many inhabitants of the house believed she had actually fallen ill the previous night. An expert actress, (by cheesy rodeo standards at least,) no one questioned her supposed flu. However Catalina was well aware of her lies. She usually was; Lucy didn't give the cook the credit she deserved.

While the two prepared the breakfast, Lucy hummed, which was a rare occurrence. "Glad to see you've recovered." Catalina threw her a sideways, knowing grin.

"It's a miracle." Lucy laughed. "You won't tell?"

"Have I ever before?" She asked in that tone adults used when they were doing something childish.

Cutting potatoes and nodding in disbelief, Lucy said, "I can't believe you knew all along."

"Why do you think I never let you cook anything? I wanted you to get a little extra sleep while you could." She reminded Lucy about the naps she took every day on the couch before waking everyone else.

Never a morning person by any stretch of the imagination, Lucy received odd looks due to her ecstatic mood as she served breakfast. Thus far in the day she only had to endure Ms. Swanson's hateful looks; Grace refused to leave her room.

"How are you feeling, Miss Walker?" James asked her as she poured him a cup of coffee.

She exercised all the self control she possessed to keep from scowling at him. His sudden concern after the way he had snubbed her at the dinner he'd begged her to attend seemed awfully two-faced of him. If it wasn't for the spectacular news Spot had unknowingly delivered from under her window, she would have been furious. However, she resolved not to sacrifice her joy for the sake of someone who had so clearly used her.

"Better. I'm sorry I had to leave."

"Don't worry about it." He said, carelessly stirring his drink with the silver spoon he'd figuratively been fed with from birth.

She frowned and thought, "_I won't_."

After finishing her small breakfast, Mrs. Johnston asked Lucy if she could watch the twins and Grace for the day. She and her mother were going shopping, and James would be with friends in the parlor, and, of course, Mr. Johnston would be in his office and was not to be disturbed. Hattie had been given the day off to finish off plans for her upcoming wedding.

Later, sitting on the floor of the nursery with Tim and Susan, she beamed. Bouncing Susan on her knee she matched the toddler's giggling and repeated over and over "He loves me," emphasizing a different word each time.

"Can you believe it?" She asked. Tim gurgled in reply. "No, me neither."

Around lunchtime, Catalina called her down. She led the twins downstairs through the parlor. Passing through the room that was already occupied by several boys, she nodded towards them. "Is that _her_?" Someone clearly unpracticed in the skill of whispering said audibly. She wasn't sure, but she thought she saw James nod the affirmative. Her skin crawled. Her dislike for James was increasing exponentially.

"Should we feed the banshee?" Catalina asked, referring to Grace.

"Do we dare?" Lucy smiled.

"Making her miss another meal would be too mean. However sending you to give it to her isn't."

"No fair."

"Funny how seniority works, isn't it?"

"No." Lucy pouted though remained in good humor.

While Catalina supervised the youngest Johnston children, Lucy took a plate to Grace. She felt eyes on her crossing the parlor and tried her best to ignore it.

She rarely saw the interior of Grace's room; permission to enter was rarely granted to anyone, especially not Lucy. When she knocked and received no answer, she turned the knob. Her arrival was greeted by a shriek. "Get out!"

"I brought you lunch. Since you missed dinner and breakfast, Catalina and I though you'd be hungry."

"You don't care about me." Her expression clearly said "_Duh._"

Lucy decided to be frank with the girl. _What the hell could it hurt? Would getting fired be that bad? _"Sure I do. I actually respect you." This took Grace by surprise. "I think you've got a lot of spunk. If you can master it and get over your bratty tendencies," That statement was the one she feared would cost her her employment. "You'd be a woman, no, a force to be reckoned with."

The younger girl stared at her skeptically, trying to distinguish whether or not she believed that the girl she abused actually respected her or if she was teasing her. She didn't think anyone had ever respected her before. She was surrounded by adults who looked down on her and often ignored her, causing her to act out. Grace said nothing, but accepted the plate Lucy proffered to her.

That night when Lucy came to get her for dinner, she was met by a small and unsure smile rather than the usual scowl Grace gave her. Smiling back, Lucy could feel that the dynamics within the Johnston family were shifting, maybe for the better.

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**So what did we all think? I hope it didn't come of as too weird with Grace but I think it was sort of important for the story. **

**Reviews please.**


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